The one thing that prevents weed from being the coolest drug known to man is that there’s nothing tragic about it. To be really cool, like the coolest of the cool, like Ray Charles, Miles Davis, Lil Wayne cool, you got to have a straight up substance abuse problem that can kill you. Otherwise, you’re just some sleepy, happy dude eating Doritos.

But luckily for us all, a bunch of sadistic scientists have been feeding lots of drugs to animals in order to find out how easy it is for them to die off it. The lethal toxicity of narcotics is rated on the LD-50 scale. It calculates what dosage it takes for 50 percent or more of human sized animals to achieve a lethal overdose. For heroin, the LD-50 is 350 mg. For cocaine, it’s 1.2 grams.

While no person or animal has ever actually died of cannabis overdose, it does have an LD-50. According to a report by Judge Francis Young for the DEA which was recently covered by Leafly, cannabis overdose would require ingesting “20,000 to 40,000 times as much marijuana as is contained in one marijuana cigarette.” The study puts your average reefer at .9 grams, so one would “theoretically have to consume nearly 1,500 pounds of marijuana within about fifteen minutes to induce a lethal response.”

Judge Young remarked that, “In practical terms, marijuana cannot induce a lethal response as a result of drug-related toxicity.” But, this was back in 1988, before mankind progressed leaps in bounds in the sciences of extraction and edible gastronomy. Let’s do some math! Say you get about a 10% yield from a run. That would give you about 150 pounds of extract from a ton and a half of dank. So, if you dabbed a pound of wax every minute for fifteen straight minutes, there’s a fifty percent chance that you will die. Who’s going to try it?


Photo via Tumblr user Sexpigeon