By Parker Winship

In a cloud of 10,000 dab hits, under a sky literally raining shatter, Dab Mags was in full effect at the Cannabis Cup SoCal this last weekend. We talked to extractors, growers, famous rappers, dispensary owners, radical activists, naked body-painted models, edible chefs, and some dabbed out motherfuckers just having a blast.

High Times had their own award ceremony last night and sure we got their winners listed at the bottom of this here article. But we also got our own awards to give out – to some overlooked people, places, and things – cuz everyone needs a shoutout now and then.

Best Blunt – The Spiral Drip Joint by Cheese

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Around 7 Sunday night, the party looked almost over. The booths were tearing down, the stiff-legged vendors shuffling out to their cars, the 5-0 even showed up. But some of us were ambitious smokers. And after two days of taking in hits, dabs, and edibles, it was time to cap the weekend off with a sticky-ass marijuana joint that was huge.

Big enough to make an impression, but not too big like one of those cartoon Cheech and Chong joints people had that burnt through a gram a second even if you’re not hitting them.

This was a beauty that made the impossible possible: got a bunch of people who thought they couldn’t get more stoned, a lot more stoned.

Best Party – Vader Village

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Even if the crowd wasn’t high on the microphone blunt and the blunt rig (yeah, that’s a real thing), even if none of them had done any drugs ever in their life, this crowd still would have been high at Vader Village – home of the biggest stage in the medicated area.

Between the shows from D12, Scoop Deville, Playmate Dani Mathers, Lil Debbie, the airguns full of nugs, shatter, and medicated honey, the twerking competition, and the rap battles, the crowd got higher than they did hitting dabs from the 420 Nurses at the booth next door.

“We’re trendsetters,” said the Vader booth MC Adam Ill to the crazed crowd. “We change up every year. They doing what we did last year.” So how is Adam going to top this insane debauchery next year? “I’m gonna have to parachute in.”

Best in Rig Innovation – Hitman’s Baseball Cap

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Doug from Hitman – he’s a gent, an innovator, and he came out with probably the best t-shirt seen at the cup. But what really made Hitman special this weekend was the built in hinged carb-cap. They sold out in the first half hour of the cup, but everyone was talking about them, so we had to stop in and see what was what. Here’s Chris holding the rig up for display.

Chris (pictured above) at the Hitman booth was the guy who first showed us the new cap. When we asked him what his job title was, he said, “I’m like a… hahahahaha.” But whatever he does, nice dude, and he holds a rig well.

Best Festival Hack – Jump The Curb

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“This is a cluster fuck,” said an old dude in an SUV. He was right. It was Saturday morning before the doors opened. The line of cars waiting in the hot sun to get let into the lot were moving slow as all fuck.

One white Jeep with Nevada plates started the movement. He jumped the curb and cruised right into the lot. “Thug life!” a passerby yelled at them. Then another car went over the curb. Then another. Then another, and on and on.

“Oh shit. It’s a jail break!” the genius passerby commentator said.

Tastiest Edible – CDXX Bakery’s Maximum Strength F’KN Cheesecake

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We talked to what felt like a thousand beautiful, smart, dabbed-the-fuck-out ladies at this cup, but our biggest crush was on a cheesecake. She was a dime. Sweet honey cookie crumble crust, creamy with just the littlest hint of sour and that sativa wax cannabutter.

She makes a mouth water and, about an hour later, she makes a brain water. The whole first afternoon was like coasting on a waterslide from booth to booth. She might be the love of our lives. Made by some friendly, but mysterious bakers whose business card’s location is listed as: “Somewhere Sunny, CA.”

Best Fail – High Times Stage

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We felt bad even taking this picture. Saturday afternoon, there were two people in the audience: a photographer and a lady who looked lost.

The sound engineer was too stoned or bored to care that one of his tent legs had partially collapsed. The gentle tap of raindrops on the roof might have been lulling him to sleep.

Still, the reggae band on stage put their heart into it, so we have to give them props. That’s the same reason we won’t name them – because we don’t want them tagged with the saddest concert pic we’ve ever seen.

Best Extract Find – LBC La Brea Collective’s Trinity OG

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“A deep taste,” one of our staff called it. Whatever that means – he had a little case of wax brain. But he went on with some more dabber poetry: “It’s smooth, elaborate. My lungs just accepted it.” Still don’t know what it means, but we all agree. This was a wet kiss from the goddess of shatter. You just got to try it yourself.

This Indica extract came from the bad boys and girls at La Brea Collective, formerly the home of the TreeHouse Social Lounge smoking club. They told us they’re planning and scheming to pop up another location for the lounge soon, so dust off your smoking jackets and get ready to climb into that new TreeHouse any minute.

Oh yeah and here’s all the actual trophy winners too…

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BEST SATIVA CONCENTRATE
1st Place – Red Dragon Budder by Dabblicious Extracts
BEST INDICA CONCENTRATE
1st Place – Lemon Walker OG by Gold Coast Extracts
BEST HYBRID CONCENTRATE
1st Place – Lemon Bananas Budder by Dabblicious Extracts
BEST NON-SOLVENT HASH
1st Place – Blissful Wizard by Incognigrow Farms
BEST INDICA FLOWER
1st Place – Kosher Kush by Greenwolf LA with Kush Company
BEST SATIVA FLOWER
1st Place – Mango Tango by Elemental Seeds
BEST HYBRID FLOWER
1st Place – Wellness OG by The W.E.E.D. in Studio City
BEST CBD CONCENTRATE
1st Place – Ringo’s Gift Super CBD Premium CO2 Oil by POP Naturals with WCHC
BEST CBD FLOWER
1st Place – V.C.D.C. from Moxie Seeds & Extracts
BEST BOOTH
1st Place – Vader Extracts
BEST PRODUCT
1st Place – Bongdom by Vader Extracts
BEST GLASS
1st Place – Vaderade By Evol Glass
BEST VAPORIZER
1st Place – 710KingPen by Kingpen & Greenwolf LA
BEST TOPICAL
1st Place – Honey Pot Bear Balm by Pure Joy Collective
BEST EDIBLE
1st Place – Reef Jerky by Badfish Extracts & Healthy Healing
BEST CBD EDIBLE
1st Place – 350 mg CBD Fresh Mint Breath Spray by Bhang Chocolate

All the good photos By Carlos Sical

Parker Winship