The distinct effects of various weed strains can be broken down by what piece of furniture they pair best with. Indica-heavy stuff goes best with a couch. Sativa-leaning strains warp-speed your brain into getting-shit-done mode – so they compliment a desk. There’s also floor weed (the stuff that knocks you out before you can make it to the couch), lamp weed (so good you go blind), and chair weed (that’s like couch weed, but when somebody else is already passed out across the whole couch).
And then there’s bed weed. That’s the stuff where when you smoke it, as the joint gets shorter, your joint gets longer. The blunt isn’t the only thing you want to put your lips on. The inside of the water rig isn’t the only thing wet. [Note to editor: come up with better weed/sex euphemisms later.] It’s an aphrodisiac.
For the first time (at least that we’re aware of), somebody’s actually branding a strain for that purpose, specifically for women. Sexxpot – a Mr. Nice strain under a different name – is being marketed, pretty shrewdly by Paradigm Medical Marijuana, as “the flowers she really wants.” Recently featured in both New York Magazine and High Times, the strain only has a 14% THC content, apparently perfect for sexy time – enough to arouse, but not enough to get you HAF, according to the product’s distributor.
Marijuana consultant and nurse practitioner Eloise Theisen told New York Magazine that she’s seen the weed work wonders on women, who call it a “game changer.”
But not everyone is so enthusiastic. Stephen D’Angelo, a pot activist and Harborside Health Center co-founder, and penis-possessor, says all the facts aren’t in to get so exactly scientific about high horniness. There are hundreds of different terpenes in the weed stuff, he told New York Magazine, and we haven’t yet broken them down enough to be precise about which ones cause what and in whom.
There’s no dab equivalent yet, but it’s probably on the way. Whether it does what it’s supposed to do or not, there’s nothing sexier than some hottie saying to you over a fatty gram, “Will you dab me out?”